It still feels like winter here. The skiing’s been great these past few weeks, but there have also been some sunny, 60-degree days. So it’s time to dust off the sticks and get back at it.
My first round of the year produced predictably erratic behavior, especially from my driver. Four holes in and I was already visiting some neighboring fairways, attempting to pull out some miraculous, Seve-style pars.
But it’s hard to scramble well when your ball dissapears into someone’s front pocket.
I don’t understand these guys who think they can pick up any golf ball that appears in their fairway. As if they own the rights to anything that lands within 1000 yards. As if no one ever deviates from the recommended landing areas. As if there’s no one else on the golf course. Wake up!
It’s funny to watch, in an irritating sort of way.
Case in point… The 4th hole on Saturday played from an elevated tee box, so we could see the whole thing unfold. Sadly, my cousin and I had two balls sitting pretty in the 7th fairway. Definitely off line, but not out of play by any stretch. We could both reach the green from there. Game on!
Here comes a guy, bee-lining it up the 7th fairway. He walks up to my ball, checks the brand, takes a quick look around, and pockets it like a clepto in a convenience store. By the time we get down there he’s scurrying off toward the green. So we whistle, and yell, and give chase.
“Was that your ball you just picked up?” I asked.
“Uhhhhh. No, uhhh I don’t think so. Well, maybe,” the guy stammers.
“Srixon 4?” I asked.
He digs around, and pulls out a brand new Srixon 4. “Oh, uhhhh…”
“Yeah, that’s mine.” He reluctantly tossed it to me.
“Thanks. You know, as a general rule of thumb, don’t pick up any ball that’s not yours,” I offered.
He mumbled something about staying in our own fairway and holding up play, etc etc. Give me a break. Probably the same guy who fishes ten balls out of the pond every time he hits one in the water.
I rushed my next shot, put it in the greenside bunker, and then missed a curly 5-footer for par. Lost the hole too. Was that my bad, or can I blame it on the cheapskate hacker who tried to pocket my ball?
Most courses have at least two fairways arranged side by side. Forget-About It. Some crossfire is inevitable, but there are a lot of newer players who simply don’t know the rules of engagement, or older guys who forgot them. Like, it’s not an easter egg hunt!
Maybe we should post signs in the clubhouse, on the first tee and in the golf carts: If it’s not YOUR ball, don’t pick it up! It’s probably the simplest rule in the entire USGA rule book, and compliance would speed up play, save you penalty strokes, and help avoid conflict and embarrassment.
If money’s the issue there are plenty of good sources for inexpensivve golf balls. But if you’re buying a bunch of random brands out of the dollar bin, spend a few minutes before the round to mark your balls. Use a sharpie, and put your initials or something on it so you can easily identify it. Then don’t play, pick up, or interfere with any other ball on the course. No matter what fairway it’s in.
